Massive Trainwreck

This event tonight is going to be hilarious! Not, of course, for the miserable people on stage (Suzanne Morrison, Claire Dederer, Kevin Emerson, David Schmader, Anastacia Rene, and myself) who will be mortified and humiliated for your amusement, but for you, as you stand there, busy eating free pizza and swilling fancy microbrew while you laugh at the peculiarity of the less fortunate and perhaps lob a few rotten turnips. It's all to raise money for literacy programs in our fine city! As well as prove that the readers themselves could probably, at one time, have benefited from just such a program. Come, it'll be fun. I'll buy you a shot of Thousand Island dressing.