Sean Beaudoin

Enough excellent writing to fill a large tube sock

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Movie Review

Wanted dir. Timur Bekmanbetov — 2.5

An astonishingly intellectually dishonest film that attempts to play itself as a cross between The Matrix and Fight Club. Surrounded a handful of clever digital effects is some blather of an explanation about a "Fraternity" that assassinates people at random due to clues sent to them in the fibers of mystical textiles. The kilings are said to save "thousands of lives" by removing those picked for assassination, but neglects to confront the fact that each of these highly stylized shootouts and car crashes kills about nine hundred innocent bystanders in the process. An "I am your father, Luke" moment is telegraphed from the very first shot. Morgan Freeman is shoehorned into a number of scenes to lend weight to the banality. The grotesque level of violence is so gleeful and uneccessary that I began to understand the conservative postition that movie violence is turning teenagers into monsters. Whoever thought this movie was funny, clever, or even appropriate for release to the general public definitely needs to have their crayons forcibly taken away. Not to mention that the plot is so relentlessly stupid I felt like I ate a case of Cool Ranch Doritos when it was over. Even Angelina Jolie looked lousy.
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