Sean Beaudoin

Enough excellent writing to fill a large tube sock

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From the Blog

Movie Review

Terminator: Salvation dir. McG — 4.0

Does a few cool effects make a movie? Nope. But they keep trying. For one thing, any movie directed by someone named "McG" deserves to fail, and hard. But this is really just a confusing mess. It cobbles together all the elements from the old movie: John Conner trying to protect his father, Kyle Reese, who is now younger than he is, because....who got sent back in time again? Oh, well. There's a picture of Linda Hamilton, and recordings of her voice that clearly isn't her. There's unbelievably cheesy CGI of Arnold. None of it makes any sense. How are these people growing food? How are some of them on a submarine? How do they communicate via radio when nothing else works? Why is Michael Ironsides being so intractable? The best things are the motorcylces, which they could have made more of, and used way more. The worst was the cute kid. We all know cute kids go first in dusty dystopias. And if they don't, they should.
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"The curves are a smoke screen, I tell myself. Inside she’s a bag of hard edges. And I, Ritchie Sudden, am prepared to eat sheet metal."

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