Sean Beaudoin

Enough excellent writing to fill a large tube sock

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Not any other Tuesday

Yes, it is 11/12/23, which, as everyone knows, is a crucial zombie apocalypse trigger date. At least according to Dianetics, the Upanishads, Be Here Now, the Mayan calendar, H.P. Lovecraft, and the memoirs of Ronald Reagan, who himself turned biter in late 1987. As something of an expert in both hysterical numerology and rampant neck-chomping, I advise spending the entire day attempting to stockpile enough AAA batteries and boxes of pistachio-flavored instant pudding to ride out dystopia. You have been warned.

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“Unless you’re a Russian general’s daughter who’s prone to lace gowns and attacks of the vapors, fainting isn’t really a good look.”

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