Sean Beaudoin

Enough excellent writing to fill a large tube sock

My Books:

"Some Tears May Be Crocodile, But My Salt Is True."

Page 87 of 91: « First  <  85 86 87 88 89 >  Last »


Cash Money

Dying to buy a half dozen paperback copies of Going Nowhere Faster? Too bad, says Faceless Corporate Book Giant, you gonna hafta wait til next year...

Yeah, it's true, the paperback won't be out until Fall 2008. So load up on those hardbounds. I dunno, it's some sort of marketing decision. Come out at the same time as Sour White and let the two of them burn down the charts. Or up the charts. Or something.

Take The Snake

Absolutely and without question the best Snake Plissken quiz I have ever seen:

My score? I'm embarrassed to admit only 8 of 9. Ernie Borgnine screwed me up.

Book Two Rears Head

Sour White, which is not a Stan sequel, is now officially done. At least the completed first draft is sitting on a desk in the Little, Brown offices in NY. The hope is to get it into copyediting by October, meaning it would hit bookshelves in fall of 2008. Which, yes, seems like an absurdly long time away. Especially if you've just finished reading Stan for the fourth time and are desperate for new product. Well, with any luck, Stan II, otherwise known as Seeing For Miles, will be quick on Sour White's heels. As always, feel free to call, email, petition, picket, or otherwise complain to Time/Warner to hurry things along. Demanding they send me bigger and more frequent checks will help.

I Am This 80's Movie

Go ahead and take the test. Apparently, I am C. Slate. Or, maybe Shannen. My eyes are a bit out of alignment....

What 80`s movie are you?


Personality Test Results

Click Here to Take This Quiz
Brought to you by quizzes and personality tests.


Actors In Rock Bands

Why do actors keep insisting on forming bands? And why are they so uniformly awful? Which one of these guys would you most want to hear sing? Does anyone want to hear Diehard play the harmonica? Does anyone remember when "Heartbeat" was roaring up the charts in 1984?

5. Don Johnson-A Sweaty Half-Pint Of Soul
4. Bruce Willis-The Hat Makes The Harmonica Makes The Hairline
3. Keanu Reeves-First To Translate Mumbling Into A Shredding Bass Solo
2. Kevin Bacon-Acoustic? Check. Brother? Check. Warbling? Check.
1. Russell Crowe-Wins On Theory Alone. Can You Envision The Pain?

(Honorable Mentions: Swayze's "band" on Dirty Dancing soundtrack just too good to make fun of, Travaolta's band, the Barbarino's or something, I've never heard)

Things To Know About, vol. #1

Eden Pastora. Smedly Darlington Butler. Harvey Pekar. Budgie. Anthony Burgess. Charles Bukowski. The Sweet. Keir Dullea. George Gervin. Iggy Pop. John Kennedy O'Toole. Aaron Burr. Yummy Fur. Man Ray. My Bloody Valentine. Eugene Ionesco. Edith Piaf. Gilberto Gil. Robert Mitchum. Errol Flynn. Saul Bellow. Kiss. Mr. Show. Voltron. The White Album. Jim Caroll. Zen Arcade.

More On Rock Bands

It has been pointed out to me that Spin Doctors was not on the orignal 10 WORST ROCK BANDS EVER list. The management at GNF greatly regrets this error and wishes to apologize for such a glaring oversight. Spin Doctors easily fits in the top 8, and "Pocket Full Of Kryptonite" is without question a Yarg Factor song of the first order.

Again, to those of you affected by this error, we are deeply sorry.

Medical Insurance Always A Plus

So, I came back from the woods missing my ACL. Or at least the part that connects it to the upper knee. So, surgery and months of rehab lie ahead. They're going to take part of my hamstring and graft it between the two ACL ends. I am wondering exactly which foul misdeed I am paying back karmically for. Probably shouldn't have poked at Steve Baldwin. He does, after all, have a direct line to The Big Man. I am walking around with a cane like this incredibly pretentious and affected wannabe-poet. I'm tempted to start wearing a beret and a cape. Well, at least Sour White is very, very close to done. Stan is jealous. I promise this weekend to spend more time with Stan. Maybe we can go cape shopping.

Wooded Unibomber-like Retreat

I am headed up North this weekend to my usual wooded retreat to finish off the last of the manuscript of SOUR WHITE, the rabidly awaited follow-up to GNF. Sadly, Sour White has nothing at all to do with Stan Smith. It does have a lot to do with the Afterlife, though, which is mostly a cynical ploy to get in on Mitch Albom's coat-tails and suck in all those readers/dollars still hankering to find out exactly who you meet in heaven. Hint: Not seventy-two virgins. Not even five virgins. What if you get up there and who you get to meet is Bob Sagat and a bunch of sweaty plumbers? Do you get a do-over? Or at least Mitch's autograph to take away a little of the sting of disappointment?

These and other questions will be answered by Sunday. At the very latest.

Russia and Reality Rodeo: Baldwinesque

Stephen Baldwin Injured in Bull Riding Fall
By Steve Gorman
LOS ANGELES (June 1) - Actor Stephen Baldwin, nursing a broken shoulder and rib from a reality-TV rodeo accident, said Friday the bull that threw him to the ground in four seconds was more fierce than he had expected.
The 41-year-old performer injured himself Thursday while working on cable network CMT's upcoming series "Ty Murray's Celebrity Bull Riding Challenge."
"I held on for about four jumps, and then I just ate a bunch of dirt," Baldwin told Reuters in a telephone interview, adding the whole bumpy ride was over in four seconds. He and fellow celebrity contestants, including rapper-musician Vanilla Ice and actor Leif Garrett, had just started training on live bulls when he got thrown.

"We were supposed to be on these kind of dainty versions of (bulls) that weren't supposed to get too excited," he recalled. "But you never can tell what a bull's gonna do. So this particular one that I had kind of rose to the occasion." He ended up with a broken left scapula and a broken rib, and was outfitted with a special brace and sling he has to wear for the next four to six weeks.
He was supposed to travel to Russia next week for a movie shoot, but his doctor told him, "I have to give the whole performance with my thumb in my pocket."


Page 87 of 91: « First  <  85 86 87 88 89 >  Last »

And, Twitter too… Also on Facebook

“Everything seems worse than it really is. Until it isn’t anymore. Just close your eyes, Sophie. Say The Nurse out loud three times, and I’ll see you in your dreams…”

site design: Juxtaprose